#BingeEater on Twitter

For kicks, checked to see if Twitter had a topic on binge eating. Yup--#BingeEater, and Oh dear, there are a lot of binge eaters. However, perusing the topic on Twitter, I´m again questioning my self-proclaimed diagnosis because

• I never feel guilty. Sometimes stupid but never ashamed or guilty.
• I never hide food to eat later. (Well, maybe I didn´t hide it, but when I live with others I had my eye on it already...)
• I never binge on food other than sweets.

But I just don´t see how eating two half gallons of ice cream in two days--instead of food (cause I get too full) isn´t binging.

Nevertheless, if I make it to January 1, I can say I really only binged once this entire year. Well, maybe I only binged for one month this entire year ćause there was also that mistake of making orange marmalade and eating all but one jar (gave that one away) in a couple days and that box of crackers (what was it I said about only binging on sweets?) and that bag of almonds (sweets?) an that jar of peanut butter (sweets?) and God forbid I buy any Freetos ćause they´d be gone in a minute. Oh well. And, uh oh, I just baked a loaf of sourdough, and sadly, how many times does the loaf disappear in a flash ´cause I love bread. No, that is substituting (for a meal) not binging. Oh well.

The Latest Research

 Since I started 2022 with an effort to control my binging rather than focussing on dieting, I thought it might be interesting to review the research thatś been going on this year.  And, wow, there have been thousands of studies in 2022 alone.

So I did a Google.Scholar search on BED research and got this nice list of current research.
Hereś a nice little abstract of one:

Binge eating disorder (BED) is characterized by regular binge eating episodes during which individuals ingest comparably large amounts of food and experience loss of control over their eating behaviour. The worldwide prevalence of BED for the years 2018–2020 is estimated to be 0.6–1.8% in adult women and 0.3–0.7% in adult men. BED is commonly associated with obesity and with somatic and mental health comorbidities. People with BED experience considerable burden and impairments in quality of life, and, at the same time, BED often goes undetected and untreated. The aetiology of BED is complex, including genetic and environmental factors as well as neuroendocrinological and neurobiological contributions. Neurobiological findings highlight impairments in reward processing, inhibitory control and emotion regulation in people with BED, and these neurobiological domains are targets for emerging treatment approaches. Psychotherapy is the first-line treatment for BED... 

(Giel, K.E., Bulik, C.M., Fernandez-Aranda, F. et al. Binge eating disorder. Nat Rev Dis Primers 8, 16 (2022). https://doi.org/10.1038/s41572-022-00344-y)

 

The studies seemed to be focussing on evaluation of current definiion and treatment methodology. I read nothing surprising except a suggestion that BED is related to ADHD and impulse control issues. Otherwise, it seems that psychotherapudic interventions are still the most effective and drug and diet control interventions not effective. Faulty body image is a big part of BED. Happily, I dont have THAT; instead, I tend to see myself thin hahahahaha.

There was a suggestion that inhibitory control training (ICT) may be beneficial and that childhood emotional abuse may contribute to the problem--duh. 

But the saddest conclusion I encountered was that BED episodes are preceeded by negative feelings which the binging aleviates; thus binging is negative REINFORCEMENT of itself!!

Stable Weight for TWO Years?

 Goodness! I haven't posted for two years! Wow! So, what's my status?

When I review my historical posts, it is clear that I have been focussed on dieting instead of the real problem: binge eating. However, over that last two years, I believe I have started focussing on controling the binging--and I think it's working. At least my weight has been steady for two years, a miracle. A reeeeeeeeal miracle!

How was this miracle achieved?

Dieting had nothing to do with it. All diets work if you stick to them. And don't binge eat. But I DO still binge. Maybe it's because I finally can say, like in AA--"Hi, my name is Camille, and I am a binge eater."

Anyway, I've learned alot about how and why I binge.

The How

I think I'm very lazy. If I'm hungry, I go for the quickest and sweetest solution. If there's a chicken in  the freezer and fresh asparagus in the fridge and bread in the box, I'll have buttered toast for dinner. Unfortunately, if there are cookies, I'll have cookies for dinner. This is just the way it is, period. If there are no sweet things, I'll just go for quickest.

Two things should now be obvious. Be sure there are no sweet things around. Be sure there are healthy quick things around. The only reason that I have any success now is that I live alone and can control my environment.When I lived with my brother, it was a nightmare because he constantly brought home sweets and was always happy to share. And nowadays, when I visit my daughter, it's also a disaster because they keep different food in the house. I also don't like to eat at restaurants often because there's too much temptation and too much food.

The why

That's quite a bit trickier. The lazy thing is key, but if I'm feeling good and have energy, I WILL actually cook. So how to maintain energy and feel good? OMG! If that isn't a conundrum. It has been my experiencce that energy is dependent on eating healthy food and getting plenty of exercise. And it's really difficult to control feeling good especially if you view it as the result of not feeling bad. We don't have much control over feeling bad when we get in an accident, get fired, get yelled at, lose our keys, run out of gas, get our feelings hurt, pull a muscle or a trillion other things. Some of us are more resilient than others.

Therefore, success for me depends on three pillars of behavior:

• get exercise
• stock quick and healthy food
• recognize and acknowledge what I will binge on and never buy it

YOU may prefer Overeaters Anonymous which offers pod casts and meetings similar to AA or psychotherapy to work on the feeling good thing or asking your doctor for a drug. There's even a "clinically validated" app! This site says it specializes in binge eating, but it is a listing of dietitions.

Or try my pillars. 

The first pillar--exercise--can be challenging. I spend most of my descretionary income on a trainer at the gym because I simply won't go otherwise. I find that the more exercise I get, the better I feel.

The second pillar--having healthy, quick food around--is way easier to achieve. I love my freezer. Frozen meals. I make soup alot and store and freeze one-serving containers of it.  

I also freeze ingredients which makes meal prep a snap. I buy mushrooms, slice them, lay them out on a cookie sheet, freeze for 30 minutes, dump into a freezer bag. I repeat this process with celery. I can buy already packaged frozen onions and carrots. 

I keep apples and cheese and buy deli sliced turkey so I can always have a sandwich. I keep frozen fruit and as much fresh fruit as is in season. I always have milk and cereal (5 minute oatmeal and out-of-the-box shredded wheat).

The last pillar is the most important and takes some time to achieve. I recognize and acknowledge what I will binge on any sweet--cookies, cake, pastries, jam, candy, honey, etc.and certain other bingeable foods such as peanut butter, raisins, nuts, an crackers.  "Hi, my name is Mary, or Bill, or Carol, or Tiffany, and I am a binge eater."

I made a New Year's resolution that I would allow myself a serving of any dessert, any time, but would no longer buy quarts, pints, or half-gallons of ice cream, dozens or boxes full of cookies, jars full of candy. Every once in awhile I go get a double scoop ice cream cone. And I regularly enjoy baking goodies, but I SHARE!  One slice for me, one slice for my trainer, one for my neighbor, and the rest for  the staff of my aparment building. And if I should need 2 tablespoons of honey or raisins or peanut butter, I borrow it from my neighbor.

***********************

It worked really well for nine months, but this month I fell when Stewarts had a sale when my favorite flavor had just been voted the best in the world!!!

So I bought two half gallons and ate them both in two days, fulfilling several binge eater criteria:

• eat alone
• eat til you're sick
• eat too much, too fast

I don't think I felt guilty (another criteria), but I certainly regretted it. A cone is sooo much more pleasant with the licking and the last bite of cone filled ice cream. Oh well.

The next day I spent $10 in the little store buying two candy bars (and I nevvvvver have candy bars), a cheese danish, and an apple turnover (don't LIKE apple turnovers) and ate them all for brunch. Then, thank God, I snapped out of it and made some pea soup. 

It'll happen. Forgive yourself and move on. Spend some time analyzing what happened and why

Back to Keto

Sadly, back to keto as of this morning. For a variety of reasons, I just couldn't hack a diet including carbs. And Voom (?) wanted me to include 'treats' in my diet, hah, which is how a 1/2 cup container of Haagan Dazs ice cream turned into five and all five got eaten the first night they were in the fridge, and a loaf of bread turned into cinnamon and sugar toast until the last piece of bread was gone. Maybe stress would have done me in regardless, but we are where we are, and I'm just a black & white person, so goodbye lovely oatmeal and fruit, fruit, fruit, and sandwiches. Happy birthday.

Sloggin' Along

Yup, sloggin' along. Getting used to logging on Noom and learned something really worth it for long term: if you're planning to eat something high in fat today for dinner, move other fats (like cream or avacado) to tomorrow. I think this is the way to have dessert once in awhile--the trick is once in awhile. For long term, I have GOT to figure this out.

However, I really don't think Noom--OR the Mediterranean diet--will work for me to lose weight in the first place. I should do this AFTER I've lost what I want to lose. It's just not working, so I'm pretty sure next week I'll give up and go back to keto. I started at 200#, went down to 198.2, but then started back up! Why??? Now sitting at 199.2 or something. This is verrrry dismotivating.

First Week on Noom

As we all know, you can lose weight on any diet. I, however, want only to lose weight but to STAY down. Noom swears it will teach me how to do that. So, what did I take away this week?

Deprivation is a no-no. I have to practice eating appropriate amounts of my 'forbidden' foods. This week I ate, as a snack, a piece of bread spread with peanut butter. I hope/plan to buy some ice cream. This is definitely good for long term.

Noom also wants me to continually expose myself, i.e., walk by the bakery isle, get some candy and leave it on my bedside table, etc. (However, temptation has never really been a problem for me while dieting.)

Noom wants me to be sure to continue any fun activities associated with food, i.e., eating out, so I committed to ordering from a restaurant once a week and preparing a real recipe once a week (because I really enjoy cooking complex meals). I'm supposed to also cook a meal FOR someone, but don't feel that my roommate is interested. Maybe Eddie?

A biggie: unless you want to carry the scale around for the rest of your life, give it up. Ooooh, difficult. To me, dieting is rigid control and measuring. So I'm proud that I'm doing it because it requires a real trust in the process. Especially difficult when that restaurant food was teriaki so I GAINED a pound last night instead of losing .2#!

Biggest problem? Fatigue. No energy. I guess that two months off really caused me to get out of shape. Now a workout or even a bicycle ride to and from the grocery store is exhausting. I'm monitoring my sleep carefully. Basically I bought the Fitbit to do that. Now I've bought a noise machine, and I'm trying to be careful to follow the rules about regular bedtime and no screens for two hours before. I just need to be vigilent. I'm also taking a nap in the afternoon, which I won't be able to do if I work...Have to be patient and continue with the exercise program...slowly!!

Because my beloved trainer moved back to Kenya, he set me up with a romote app, Trainerize Fitness App. I PLAN to follow his routines three times a week...we'll see...but I'll be paying $150/month so I have some motivation.

I'm tired just thinking about my new life! No more spending the day in bed. Gotta walk to/from the grocery store practically every day. Gotta get in my steps, gotta, gotta, gotta. Oops, that's another thing I got from Noom: find the FUN in exercise!! I chose tennis (hahahaha), bicycling (doable), and dancing (hahahaha). So I told my trainer that I need to reach the point where after the workouts I feel GOOD. Right now I just always feel exhausted. SLOW DOWN!

New app - Noom

After two weeks of living with my daughter (recovering from c-section birth of twins)--and the accompanying stress, lack of exercise, squewed schedule, strange food, temptations (cookies, candies, chips, crackers--you name it)--I was a mess and had gained five pounds. Not bad at all considering that during that time I also had to vacate my apartment and move in to a new situation (roommate).

Feeling totally out of control I was happy to re-up a diet and exercise plan. Contacted my trainer and arranged for a week (three) of sessions and a remote plan moving forward. The new apartment house offers yoga starting next week!! And on Facebook I was tempted to try NOOM, which perports to be a guided plan, that is it has coaches. It also may be a way to do a controlled Mediterranean diet. It costs $ but they offer a 2-week inexpensive trial, so here we go--and I'll go back to the store and buy rice, pasta, and bread!!